The Count

So here it is, kids, this is the list of what I got for Christmas.  I know it's ridiculously long and that may disappoint some or cause incessant jealousy.  But trust me I will share with you what I can in the coming year.  Just ask.  But break anything and it will cost you your life...

-a black leather jacket
-War of the Worlds DVD
-Seinfeld Seasons 1-3 DVD Gift Set
-Seinfeld Season 5 DVDs
-Seinfeld Season 6 DVDs
-Hot Shots DVD
-Hot Shots: Part Deux DVD
-Constantine: 2-Disc DVD
-The Muppet Movie DVD
-Carlin On Campus DVD (George Carlin HBO standup special)
-The Lost Weekend DVD (Great Billy Wilder movie, check it out)
-Bull Durham DVD
-a WSOP high-end card shuffler (though I don't need it and I'm very proud of that)
-Gun PS2 Game
-Star Wars BattleFront II PS2 Game
-MVP Baseball 2005 PS2 Game
-a Turtle Wax Car Care set
-a poster with all the greatest celebrity mugshots
-200 smackers (that's cash-money)
-a $25 gift card to Barnes and Noble
-Baseball And Philosophy Book

And that's the count! 

On a serious note, I am the luckiest S.O.B. in at least San Diego.  My family has, year in and year out, spoiled me to embarassing degrees.  I am forever greatful(Correction: grateful) to them yet again and hopefully, I can come somewhat close to earning all these great gifts.  I love you guys (by that I mean my family and friends and not actually a group of random dudes)!

It's My Life, Don't You Forget

Your Life: The Soundtrack

Opening credits: "Knight Rider Theme" by ??? 

Waking up: "Welcome To The Jungle" by Guns N Roses 

Average day: "Waggy" by Blink-182 

First date: "Teenage Dirtbag" by Wheatus 

Falling in love: "Can't Help Falling In Love" by Elvis Presley 

Love scene: "Let's Stay Together" by Al Green 

Fight scene: "Back In Black" by AC/DC 

Breaking up: "It's No Good" by Depeche Mode 

Getting back together: "With Or Without You" by U2 

Secret love: "Why Can't This Be Love" by Van Halen 

Life's okay: "Island In The Sun" by Weezer 

Mental breakdown: "Chop Suey" by System of a Down 

Driving: "I Can't Drive 55" by Sammy Hagar 

Learning a lesson: "Liar" by Rollins Band
Deep thought: "Overkill" by Men At Work 

Flashback: "Yesterday" by the Beatles

Partying: "Paint It Black" by the Rolling Stones 

Happy dance: "The Impression That I Get" by the Mighty Mighty Bosstones
Regreting: "Pictures of You" by the Cure 

Long night alone: "Kill" by Jimmy Eat World 

Death scene: "Tears in Heaven" by Eric Clapton 

Closing credits: "Simple Man" by Lynyrd Skynyrd 

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"Your Life: The Soundtrack"
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Guess who's done with school, motherfuckers?!

It's more of a statement than a question. True, I'm not fully done with school. In fact, I have 2 more semesters to go but I had a metric shitload of stuff to do today and I finished it not 5 minutes ago and I'm so excited I could put my fist through a brick wall! That would probably hurt, so I won't but I feel like it. It's looking like it'll be another semester of straight-A's. I am kind of a genius. I finally get to enjoy the thought of the upcoming holiday, minus the gifts I have yet to buy and what my credit card statement will look like. But it's still pretty awesome. Hey! I'm pretty awesome! Just as I wrote when my professor asked us what grade we felt we deserved. Take that, hippy-liberal-douche! I win, haha! Now bring on the presents... :-P Pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbth!!!

Chocolate

You know what the downside to chocolate is, if there is one. It's the point at which it ceases being a tasty treat and becomes a laxative. That really is a bummer, in your bum-er. It does have something that vanilla doesn't have though. Chocolate comes in milk form. Does vanilla? Or is that just called milk? These are just some of the things I think about while on the toilet. It must be noted that I'm not currently on the toilet though that would be possible seeing as I'm using my laptop. But that would be gross and wrong. Like Paris Hilton! :-P Pbbbbth!!!

Hey, what, who?

Hey, kids!  I know you've been jonesin' for something to read and I've been pretty busy until now, but wait no longer.  It's time for another rendition of mini-rants.

Mini-Rant#1:  What's with the song, "My Humps?"  Humps???  You mean boobs, right?  Why the hell would I want to associate those wonderful things with camels?!  "Lovely lady lumps???"  First off that sounds like a cancerous growth.  But really, when I prefer to alliterate, I would call them "free-hanging funbags."  Sweater pillows is also a term of supreme endearment.  Knockers and juggs are a close second.  "Nice Knockers," that's a good name for a song.  And it makes you think.

Mini-Rant#2:  School's almost done.  It's about fucking time.

Mini-Rant#3:  Christmas vs. Holidays.  God-fucking-dammit, this topic has come up on all the news shows lately and it's really pissing me off.  Stores promote their sales as holiday sales instead of Christmas sales and it's got Christians all in a uproar.  They think the holiday is being stolen from them by the media and advertising because of the more P.C. term. 

Shut the fuck up.  Honestly, Christians, what don't you get?  Not everybody celebrates Christmas.  If a company wants to be more inclusive, that's their right.  If they want to use the word, "Christmas," that is also their right.  The government has to use more inclusive words, regardless of what bullshit they spew about the founding fathers.  They're representing entire communities.  Target is a commercial entity.  They represent their stockholders.  If they think being more P.C. will get them a few more bucks, then let 'em do it.  Don't get all uppety because it isn't what you like.

And don't start with the stupid bullshit downfall of civilization talk.  You're going to the store to buy an X-Box!  Are you doing that in the lord's name?  No???

Then shut the fuck up.

Mini-Rant#4:  I don't like that it's cold.  My hands are freezing.  I turn the heat on.  And now I'm burning up.  You can't fucking win.

Mini-Rant#5:  I hate Christmas songs.  That's right, I said Christmas songs.  Who are we kidding, that's what they're about.  I can't stand them because they all manage to put me to sleep.  They're totally emotionless and boring.  It's the same old crap all day long on stations like KyXy. 

There are a few exceptions though.  Elvis's "Blue Christmas", Perry Como(Correction: Bing Crosby) and David Bowie doing "Little Drummer Boy" and that's about it. 

Anything by Johnny Mathis blows.  He blows.  Fuck 'Em!

And that's how it ends, folks!  I'm actually in a pretty good mood, for an asshole... :-P Pbbbbth!!!

A Harrowing Look Back

1) Was 2005 a good year for you?
It was pretty good.  I went to a lot more parties and made a lot of new friends.

2) What was your favorite moment of the year?
There was this place I went.  I can't remember what it was called...

3) What was your least favorite moment of the year?
Editing audio for days on end.

4) Where were you when 2005 began?
In a room at the Hyatt with Ivan and Butch.  You wouldn't know without asking, would you?  You didn't show up, ya bastards!

5) Who were you with?
See above.

6) Where will you be when 2005 ends?
I don't know.  My options are open.  Let the inviting begin!

7) Who will you be with when 2005 ends?
I'm sure Butch will be there but outside of that I don't honestly know.  I'd like to think that "babes" will encompass it.

8) Did you keep your New Years resolution of 2005?
I didn't make one and if I did, then I forgot.

9) Do you have a New Years resolution for 2006?
And end my streak of non-participation?!  Never!

10) Did you fall in love in 2005?
I did not.
11) If yes, with who?
If no, then what?

12) If yes, do they know?
If no, does anyone care?

14) You regret it?
Sure, why not...

15) Did you break up with anyone in 2005?
No. 

16) Did you make any new friends in 2005?
Yes I did.  I remade some too. 

17) Who are your new friends?Lizet, Jamie, Leslie, Christina, Merissa, Peter, Morgan,Dan(imal) B., Alyssa, David, Shawn, Caleb, Erica, Dan C., Dan W., Chris G., Fara, Katie, Jasmin (remade), Amanda, Carly, Joanna, Erin, Rick!, Sergio, Cesar, Brandon, Sean, Denise G., Natalie, and I think that's it.  If I forgot anybody, be sure to remind me.

18) What was your favorite month of 2005?
August but July was pretty cool too.

19) Did you travel outside of the US in 2005?
No.

20) How many different states did you travel to in 2005?
1

21) Did you lose anybody close to you in 2005?
Fortunately not.

22) Did you miss anybody in the past year?
Of course.

23) What was your favorite movie that you saw in 2005?
Sin City

24) What was your favorite song from 2005?
"Disintegration" by Jimmy Eat World

25) What was your favorite record from 2005?
I didn't really buy anything new other than "Stay On My Side Tonight" the EP by Jimmy Eat World

26) How many concerts did you see in 2005?
3, Jimmy Eat World (redundant), Red Pony Clock, and Motionless.

27) Did you have a favorite concert in 2005?
I hate to sound like a broken record but Jimmy Eat World.

28) Did you drink a lot of alcohol in 2005?
No but I watched a lot of people do it.  I chuckled inside mostly.

29) Did you do a lot of drugs in 2005?
No.

30) How many people did you sleep with in 2005?
None in the fun way. 

31) Did you do anything you are ashamed of this year?
I sure I did something.  But whatever, learn by doing.

33) What was the worst lie someone told you in 2005?
"I'll call you" was pretty big.  "I wasn't involved in that prank call" was pretty bad.

34) Did you treat somebody badly in 2005?
No.  A jedi does not these things.

35) Did somebody treat you badly in 2005?
Am I alive?  Then yes, but I've had worse.

36) How much money did you spend in 2005?
Too fucking much.

37) What was your proudest moment of 2005?
Making movies.

38) What was your most embarrassing moment of 2005?
I almost fell on a moving sidewalk at the Luxor.

39) If you could go back in time to any moment of 2005 and change something, what would it be?
I'd probably try to spend less money on stuff.  Otherwise, no regrets.

40) What are your plans for 2006?
Jesus, more school.  Internship in the Summer.  Graduation in the Fall.  A return trip to Vegas is in order...

Don't Call It A Countdown

I have officially been single (or at least not in a relationship) for 5 years today. I only remembered because somebody mentioned the date and the anniversary of Pearl Harbor (the attack not the movie, though the movie could be seen as an attack of sorts). Yes, it was 5 years ago today I was dumped, on the phone no-less. The time has not been entirely lonely. I've had girls float in and (almost immediately) out of my life. Nothing ever amounted to a relationship in that time. Something always got in the way. Boyfriends, first and foremost. Then there was the lying whore that broke my heart last summer. Oh, she was a beaut. She's getting married by the way. In case you're wondering, this really isn't an emo blog for me. I'm not necessarily happy at the time that's passed but I think I've been somewhat fortunate, in that, I haven't gotten into anything that wasn't right for me. I've managed to avoid some hazards. "Blind luck," I guess. I guess what it boils down to is that I haven't dated or accepted just anyone. I've got my standards. And as high as they might be (or who might fit them), I've stuck to them because I think they make you who you are. So I'll continue to be single, or unspoken for, or whatever till the right girl comes into the picture. It's kind of like a camera pointed in one direction and hopefully she'll walk up into the frame and be like, "Hi! My name is _____. What are you filming?" "Funny you should ask..."

The Gift That Keeps On Giving

January
1. Did you have a new year's resolution this year? Nope
2. If so, did you go through with it? It'd be hard to accomplish something you never set out to.
3. Does it snow where you live? God no.
4. Do you like hot chocolate? If it's cold out, hell yes.  Fumari does it really well.  Denny's also does and the best part there is, free refills.
5. Have you ever been to times square to watch the ball drop?No way.  They don't call it Times Square for nothing.
6. Do you or anyone you know have a birthday in this month?Jim Carrey but nobody I know personally.
February
1. Did you have a Valentine last year? Unfortunately not.
2. Did you WANT a valentine? It would stand to reason.
3. Did you play in the snow? You know, I would have...
4. Do you have February break? Not in this state.
5. When you were little, did you buy valentines for your wholeclass? I did.  I believe they were Ninja Turtle ones and then WWF ones.  I always saved the good ones for the pretty girls though.
6. Do you or anyone you know have a birthday in this month? Butch and my friend Jesse from high school. 
March
1. Are you Irish? Only in spirit.  I love U2!
2. Do you wear green on St. Patty's Day? I try but I don't stress.
3. Do you believe in leprechauns, four leaf clovers and all thatstuff? Fuck no.
4. Do you or anyone you know have a birthday in this month?Rica, Wayne, and my sister Chrissy.
April
1. Do you like the rain? It's alright, so long as it doesn't interfere with my softball schedule. 
2. Do you celebrate Easter? I try not to.
3. Do you get tons of candy on Easter? I try not to.
4. Have you ever danced or kissed in the rain? I actually have done both, though, it was really more of a mist than a rain.
5. Do you believe in the Easter bunny? No.
6. Do you or anyone you know have a birthday in this month?My grandma.
May
1. What's your favorite kind of flower? None.  I have male genitalia.
2. Do you love your mommy? If'n you don't, there's somethin' wrong witcha.
3. Do you like the spring? Eh.  It's okay I guess.
4. Finish the phrase; APRIL SHOWERS: Lick balls.
5. What would you think of as a spring color? Light green.  Rainbows.  How the fuck...?
6. Do you or anyone you know have a birthday in this month? Can't say that I do.
June
1. What's the last grade you graduated from? 16th
2. What day did/do you graduate school? That was SOooo long ago...
3. Do you love your daddy? Of course, man, I'm not a communist.
4. Do you or anyone you know have a birthday in this month? I think Lizet.
July
1. Do you have any special occasions on 4th of July? We used to but it's been pretty lame the last two or three years.
2. Would you consider yourself patriotic? A true patriot fights to protect his/her country, from itself.
3. Do you go on any vacations during this month? No.  I go to Comic-Con, so my money's all tied up in that.

4. Ever gotten really drunk on 4th of July? Is that what it's for?  Shit.  Where have I been?!
5. Do you or anyone you know have a birthday in this month?My Uncle Joe, Jen, Cyndi, Edson, and My ex (yuck).
August
1. Do you do anything special to end off your summer? I went to Vegas...
2. Does school start during this month? Generally no, but this year was different.
3. Do you go swimming a lot in the summer? I hardly ever go anymore.
4. Do you like swimming? Yeah but it's kind of a whole day activity.  And you can't really eat.
5. Do you go to the beach a lot? Not really, but I do go and enjoy it while I'm there. 
6. Do you or anyone you know have a birthday in this month?No, not really.

September
1. Does school start during this month? Usually.
2. Do you like school? Does a bear shit in the woods?  Wait, that's wrong.  Uh, fuck no.
4. Who's your favorite teacher? Greg!!!
5. Do you like fall better than summer? No way.
6. Do you or anyone you know have a birthday in this month? My Aunt Christina and my Uncle Johnny, who, ironically, are married.  Corey also does. 
October
1. What was your craziest Halloween costume ever? Pee-Wee Herman.
2. Do you still go trick or treating? Not for candy, if you know what I mean...
3. What's your favorite candy? Smarties.4. What are you gonna be this year? I was Indiana Jones (see photos).
5. Do you or anyone you know have a birthday in this month?Me, first and foremost, my Dad, and my Aunt Leslie.
November
1. Who's house do you usually go to for Thanksgiving? We used to alternate but now it's at my Aunt Christina's full-time cause my grandma lives with them. 
2. Do you like stuffing? I usually like stuffing my face but that's more of a daily thing than a "just on Thanksgiving" thing. 
3. What are you thankful for? Free wireless internet (thanks neighbors!).
4. Name everyone who's at your family dinners? Normal dinners?  Me, my sister, and my parents, with the dogs circling the table like vultures. 
5. Do you or anyone you know have a birthday in this month?My Mom, Merilynn, and my buddy Stephen from high school.
December
1. Do you celebrate christmas? I celebrate the shit out of it!
2. Hanukah? No, I believe that's for the Jews.
3. Do you get presents? Bigger and better than I deserve.
4. What's your favorite present you ever got? PS2 was pretty awesome.
5. Do you like cold weather? Not really, but I sleep better.
6. Do you or anyone you know have a birthday in this month? Jamie and Correction:Omar