Sunday, February 5, 2006

What else should I be doing on a Saturday Night?

1)Who is the last person you high-fived?
I think it was Marco at his birthday rock out.

2) If you were drafted into a war, would you survive?
Of course.  I'd be booted out of the military for insubordination so fast I wouldn't even know I'd been gone.

3) Do you sleep with the TV on?I wasn't born with a silver spoon up my ass, therefore, I don't have a TV in my bedroom.  Also I find it's bad to sleep with appliances on.

4) Have you ever drank milk straight out of the carton?
Who drinks out of a carton?  I prefer to call it a milk jug.

5) Have you ever won a spelling bee?
I lost in 2nd grade on the word "beat."  Did you know there are two ways to spell it???

6) Have you ever been stung by a bee?
Once.  I did it to myself which is the dumbest part.  My hand swelled up like a balloon.  Does that mean I'm allergic?

7) How fast can you type?Fast enough.

8) Are you afraid of the dark?
When I'm feeling particularly girly.

9) What color are your socks?I make it a habit to not wear socks after 1am, when possible.

10) Have you ever made out at a drive-in?
But then I would miss the movie...
11) When is the last time you chose a bath over a shower?
After my rubber ducky died, I vowed I would never again bathe sitting down...

12) Do you knock on wood?
Never had to knock on wood, but I know someone who has, which makes me wonder if I could, because I'm sure it isn't good, and I'm glad I haven't yet, it's the impression that I get.

13) Do you floss daily?If by "daily", you mean "every day"...

14) Do you wanna Fanta?
Nah, I'll take a Crush or a Sunkist if ya got one though!

15) Can you hula hoop?
I've never been much for hula hoopin'...

16) Are you good at keeping secrets?
Goodness no.

18) Do you know the Muffin Man?
That's an awful thing to call the fat guy down the street.  Shame on you, Sir!

19) Do you talk in your sleep?
Just the secrets that I keep.

20) Who wrote the book on love?
I'm gonna say Nietzsche but that's probably wrong.

21) Have you ever flown a kite?
Isn't that a slang term for a jew?  And no.

22) Do you ever wish on fallen lashes?I don't wish upon tragedies of nature.  How dare you.

23) Do you whiten your teeth?I attempt to on a daily basis but my toothbrush must be defective.

24) Can you smell what the Rock is cooking?
I'm not a big fan of cooking shows.

25) Have you ever asked for a pony?
I find horses do the most damage when full grown.

26) Have you, or would you ever, donate sperm/eggs?
Life's hard.  Money is scarce.

27) Can you juggle?
I prefer to date one lady at a time and I don't appreciate your inference.

28) Missing someone now?
Well, now you've certainly made me paranoid that I am...

30) Do the chickens have large talons?
Do the movies actually make you laugh?

32) Are you ready to rumble?
Generally, when I rumble, I just need to take a shit.

34) Have you ever been suspended or expelled from school?
I've never been a big fan of being hung from any tall buildings, or being shot out of them either.

35) How do you spell relief?
I don't think you should be asking the guy who misspelled "beat".

36) Have you ever crawled through a window?
Well, it makes more sense than trying to crawl over one.

37) Have you ever eaten dog food?
Is food really categorized merely by what eats it?  That's sad.

38) Can you handle the truth?Depends, can I feel it first?

39) Do you like green eggs and ham?
Eggs are just rejected chicken fetuses.  And they're delicious when scrambled!

40) Who is your daddy?
Oh, now you've crossed the line, buddy!

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