Saturday, April 9, 2011

No Glee For Me

Hey kids,

So I was at a party about a month ago and a friend recommended that I watch the show Glee.  I tried to politely decline but was bombarded by the rest of the party guests who were Glee watchers or "Gleeks" as they're known by themselves.  Needless to say I didn't get a chance to properly state my reasons so here we go:

First off, when I was in high school I had an interest in taking drama classes but the only plays that they put on were musicals.  I cannot sing.  Not remotely.  Well, that's not entirely accurate.  I can carry a tune but I have no desire to sing publicly.  So effectively, musicals ruined any aspirations I might have had about acting.  Musicals in general don't bother me.  They're certainly not high on my list of shows to watch though.  I have an older sister so I've seen Grease and West Side Story more times than I'd like to admit.  I've also gone and seen productions of these shows that my friends have been in.  But I've never seen myself in them.

Secondly, and most importantly, I'm 28 years old and I couldn't give a shit about high school kids.  There.  I said it.  There seems to be a fascination lately about teenage celebrities like Miley and Bieber and shows about teenagers like Glee, 90210, Gossip Girl and so on.  When I was in my teens I'm sure this shit was fascinating to me too.  But "I'm a grown ass man, dawg."  So why would I watch a show about people whose biggest problems are whether or not they get to go to prom with Johnny.  Waa-waa-waa!  Who gives a fuck?!  If that's your idea of drama, you are either trying to escape all of the real issues of today or you are so privileged that these meaningless pursuits are all you have to worry about.  This probably the same reason that shows like The Hills were popular too.

I've been to high school.  I've been a teenager.  Believe me, it's all bullshit.  Much like the no bullying campaigns say, "It gets better," well it gets worse too.  Life, I mean.  Problems multiply, financial strains, mature relationships, figuring out who the fuck YOU are, and that's just staying within the personal level.  If you pay attention even marginally to the news, you'll see war, genocide, poverty, starvation, and general nincompoopery.  So when Sally gets a big zit before her big speech in home ec., you can see why those problems might fail to ruffle even my ball hairs.  Sorry for the visual.

And no, a bunch of kids singing popular songs is not enough for me.  The original versions are fine.  Song writing is more impressive than song performance.  It always has been and it always will be.  If you've ever tried to write a song, you know how hard it is.  Everyone of us has been in a chorus.  Because it's not hard, and it rarely sounds good.

So I'll pass, Gleetards.  Well, that's meaner than I meant to be.  Same goes to you, Twilight and Harry Potter.  As George Carlin once said brilliantly, "There's too much attention paid to children."  And as the proverb goes, "Youth is wasted on the young."  And get off my lawn.

:-P    Pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbth!!!

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